“I drift slowly into sleep, marveling how the world has righted itself in one evening”

Um…

…no.

You’re back with your boyfriend and he got you an iPad. Yay. Buuut the following situations are still unresolved:

  • He’s still a stalker and abuser
  • He still wants a kinkier relationship than you
  • Your boss is still hitting on you
  • You’re still starving yourself to death
  • Your best friend and sexual assaulter still invaded your privacy to exhibit pictures of your face, and still thinks this was okay
  • You’re still in denial about your crush on your roommate.
  • You still don’t have a trusting or open relationship with your boyfriend…
  • …or your friends…
  • …or your family
  • Did I mention that ALL THE FACTORS LEADING UP TO YOUR BREAKUP ARE STILL THERE?
  • NOTHING HAS BEEN RIGHTED
  • ALL HAS MERELY BEEN RESET BY A COUPLE OF WEEKS
  • OH MY GOD

“Putting my ear buds in, I pull the flattened Charlie Tango balloon from underneath my pillow and hug it to me.”

Just to put this in context: this is a grown woman whose response to regaining a relationship is to hug a helicopter balloon. A deflated helicopter balloon.

…Whatever turns you on, I guess.

Anonymous asked:

Regarding what that last anon said, anyone going around calling Ana a 'gold digging whore' frankly sounds jealous. Jealous and hateful of a fictional character's lifestyle, because they want a husband like Christian, with all the wealth that includes. This reeks of exactly the kind of bitchy behaviour that James writes into the book whenever Ana sneers at anyone with a vagina for drooling over Christian. I'm really disappointed to hear there are real-life women out there re-enacting it.

I think it’s a complicated situation, and I don’t think it’s as simple as jealousy. I honestly think it has more to do with a deep-rooted social tendency to look at characters, especially female characters, when we’re trying to critique a story, and even more to do with the basic need many, if not all, people have to try and make someone responsible.

Basically, Ana fits into a cliche - the “gold-digger”, the “whore”, the “spineless victim” - which is part of the way we rationalise injustices like abuse and rape. We look for these patterns, especially in women, especially in fictional woman.

So, yes, it is still about misogyny and ‘girl hate’, but I don’t think it’s really about jealousy. Some of it may be, but I think more of it is about hatred and a need to believe that people who are attacked and marginalised deserve to be attacked and marginalised, whether or not they’re fictional.

…You’re right that it is very reminiscent of Ana’s reaction to other women, though, I’ve got to say.

Anonymous asked:

I'm sorry to bother you but I don't know who I could talk to about this! Lately I noticed even people who hate this book hate it because Ana is "Grey's easy gold digger whore" and if she was really in such an abusive relationship why didn't she go to the cops and blah. I've seen people who dislike the book DEFEND christian and say there's no abuse because it was consensual and Ana didn't say no "with a strong conviction". I mean, wtf??? Even people who hate this shit make me hate everything GAAH

I have one thing to say to those people:

image

There are literally hundreds of better reasons to hate the book, or even the character, than this. If you’ve decided you hate the book, but the biggest reason for hating it includes slut-shaming, misogyny, and the systematic devaluing and undermining of abuse victims’ experiences…

image

Seriously. Why not focus on the fact that Anastasia is, separate from Christian’s abuse, an abuser in her own right? Or the fact that, far from being “easy”, she’s the model Madonna/whore dichotomy, with her guilt about sexuality mitigating the fact that she has sex at all? Or the way her sexual autonomy is taken away from her  entirely? Or her utter lack of concern for anyone else? Or…

Look, people, Anastasia’s character flaws are a very very tiny minority of the problems with this book. If your problem with the book is that it’s about a woman who has sex and “allows” herself to be abused, then I would like to politely invite you to GTFO.

*deep breath*

Well, I’m glad I got that off my chest…

“I shall curl up with the iPad that you have so kindly given me and fall asleep browsing in the British Library, listening to the music that says it for you.”

Who talks like this?

Like, every word of this drips sarcastic over-formality, but she doesn’t seem to be being sarcastic. I don’t get it. This is not the way that a 21-year-old American students writes emails to her boyfriend, is it? Is it?

Hell, I don’t write emails like this, and I thought I was about as pretentious as they come.

“You’ll be relieved to know that Dr. Flynn also enjoys my sense of humor.”

Dr Flynn is a fucking terrible psychiatrist, based on what you’ve said.

There’s a line between accepting a client’s issues and providing a safe space, and implicitly normalising stalking and sexual assault. So either Christian is lying permanently about Dr Flynn, or Dr Flynn needs to go back to psychiatric training.

“His response makes me smile, still so bossy, still so Christian. Will that change, too? And I realize in that moment that I hope not.”

Make your goddamn mind up, woman.

Also, seriously? You seriously don’t want him to stop bossing you around, stalking you, controlling your life, demanding to know everything, and blaming all of it on you?

“To: Anastasia Steele
I’m glad you like it. I bought one for myself.”

The relevance of this being…?

Is it just supposed to be “it must be good; I deigned to own one”? Because if so, god, you’re a twat.

Well, actually, you’re a twat anyway, but that’s irrelevant.

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Tearing apart the fastest-selling book on record, one kinkshaming, poorly-worded, unintentionally hilarious line at a time.

This blog's OTP is Kate/Anastasia, and it fervently believes that Christian is secretly Batman. There is no reason for this.

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